The Amateur Mind: Part II
Putting your Alarms in the Wrong Place
The following is an analysis of a recent”lost battle”. My clients analysis is in italics. My comments are in normal font.
Maurice, here is question 5 after my lost battle last night.
The technique used was with my iPod. This is the same technique Satan has usedf in my last lost battles. Like this last battle, my previous lost battle 56 days ago, he used my pride against me. I felt adequately strong enough in my own efforts to bypass the border patrol that had kept me alive in the last 8 weeks. I downloaded an app that slowly tempted me here and there till I gave in. It was late at night when it took place, in my room. This is the same pattern.
Level 5 in the f-it stage felt like it never came. It continually felt like a retarded conversation. The reality of level 5 occurred when YouTube just wasn’t working for me, so I downloaded a google app. (I, till the day before, had it so I could not download apps onto my iPod and YouTube was also blocked-for this reason.)
This is a good analysis so far, but in order to be thorough, we would need to look for the F-it moment associated with changing the setting on the iPod that allows you download apps. If there was a legitimate app that you needed, then we need to discuss why you didn’t follow through on resetting the settings to blocking downloads.
Level 4 was during YouTube and specifically right before deciding to download the other app.
Level 3 was after a long and tiring night at work. As I got out of my car and grabbed my iPod the “dude” came. I shrugged off that feeling and had the thought to perhaps leave my iPod there in the car over night. After this thought I sat in my car for a minute listening to music then grabbed my iPod out of habit and went inside feeling stronger than I really was to overcome the temptations that were to follow.
Notice how you are convoluting thoughts and feelings. In order to win this war, you are going to have to not only move your alarm system from the Level 3 (thoughts) beyond the Level 2 (feelings) to the fine point of Level 1 (chemicals). As with any military strategy, confusing the enemy with something like smoke bombs is an important technique. If you cannot isolate the elements of the attack, you will not be able to kill it.
Notice that the “dude” moment is a thought. IN your analysis there is no description of feelings. You did use one feeling word in your Level 2 analysis, but you have almost no feeling words in this analysis. I understand (and can relate) that, as a man, noticing feelings, let alone naming them can be very challenging. If I were to guess what you are feeling in the car is would be some kind of agitation. Feelings associated with thoughts like, “I don’t care. I don’t want restrictions (frustrated with needing restrictions/rules). I want to relax and stop thinking (feeling tension and/or overwhelm). There could be aggravation associated with feeling like you aren’t where you want to be in life and things aren’t going the way you had planned. You may be feeling stress because you are behind and you don’t feel like you are catching up.
In future analysis, work hard to find at least 5 feelings associated with each lost battle (or close call). You may need to pray for the Spirit of Discernment before doing this. You may need to do some guessing. You may need a thesaurus.
With respect to “went inside feeling stronger than I really was”, while it is true that we can only have one thought at a time, we can have more than one feeling at a time. We can feel confident and worried at the same time.
Level 2 was still lurking from a level 3 and almost 4 earlier in the day (Satan using the same technique then as in this lost battle). I was bored at home knowing that I did not need to get up early the next day and was wanting something entertaining to do at the late hour after work.
Level 1 came, as I said, from work being long and tiring and annoying with lots to do, not enough time to do it and no energy to want to work. Plus because there was so much to do, I missed my ward FHE get together.
This is good, but now name the feelings associated with missing the FHE get together.
If you look closely, with the Spirit of Discernment, you will be able to identify physiological feelings associated with your body more than your emotions. If you look closely, you will be aware of a change in your breathing, a slight shift in your pores (almost sweating if not already doing so). Notice the pace of your heart rate.
In order to win for a life time, you will need to memorize and “bookmark” the elements of your Level 1 and Level 2. You will need to attach an alarm (trip wire) to these feelings. That trip wire is going to have to be connected to your Warrior Chemistry bucket. You will need to respond the same intensity that you would if you heard someone sneaking into your baby daughter’s bedroom in the middle of the night with a knife to slit her throat!
Replaying the event, I see many places where I could have countered Satan’s attacks. When downloading the google app I could have stopped there. I could have listened ti the prompting of leaving my iPod in my car. But the biggest thing I could have done is not leaving the gaping hole in my border by allowing myself to be able ti download apps and allowing YouTube on my iPod. That had been my safety in times of winning and this same mistake has been the reason of my falls. Satan used my pride of the & weeks to destroy me when I was literally a week away from going back to the temple- for the first time in at least 6 months.
Your ideas are valiant, but too late. You have listed 3 behaviors/actions you need to attend to. If I were Satan, I would just smile. It is almost like you plan is to duck faster next time you hear a bomb going off. As we all know, if you hear the sound of a bomb, it is already too late. We need to get you to the point where you are like a dog and you can smell bombs. We need you to be able to sense the presence of bombs and then to react with the same intensity.
Drills I shall implement are, for one, asking my mom ti follow up with me when I ask her to unlock my restrictions on my iPod so she can re-lock whatever it was I was wanting to do or download in the first place, eliminating that chance for Satan to slip in through the wide open door with a welcome sign on it.
Another valiant effort, but there are 2 major pieces that need to be corrected. 1 – don’t make a plan that relies on another person. People may love us, but they have their own burdens to bear, and they may not be in a position to help in the time of crisis. The verse, “do not rely upon the arm of flesh” comes to mind. If someone is there to help, that is a bonus. We need to make a plan that does not require another person’s help.
2 – your plan does not include actual Drills. Drills are things you do over and over and over again. There will need to be some similarity to athletic or music training if it is going to classify as a real drill. Drills in sports often include a pattern of, “They do this, then we do this, then they do this, then we do this, etc.” Drills are initially done in slow motion, then sped up to real time. Drills are done over and over and over again until they become automatic.
In your situation, with this type of Satanic attack, I would first get very clear on the initial physiological sensations (Level 1) and emotions (Level 2) commonly experienced in this location (car/ bedroom) at this time of day (end of a long day). Then I would make a plan to feel (dump warrior chemistry into my body – sometimes referred to as the “Oh, Sh**!” moment.) Then I would bust out of my car/bedroom and run full speed out to my mailbox or the nearest stop sign as if someone I love is being attacked in that location.
Then I would go back to my original place, remember/call to mind my Level 1 and Level 2 sensations, dump the Warrior Chemicals again and sprint to the same “Flag Pole” again with the same intensity. I would do this 5 times every day for 21 days. If you really want to beat this addictive behavior for the rest of your life, you will have to do whatever it takes. If you are hoping you will not have to get this dedicated or this ferocious, I invite you to remember Mosiah 20:11 “…and like Dragons they did fight!”
You can use the same system to overpower the “I don’t feel like doing my border patrol” sensations. Go to place where you tend to have that feeling. Recall the feeling (Satan’s attack), then crush his head with your body, with Warrior Chemistry and sprinting to your “Flag Pole”. Do this 5 times a day for 21 days and every time you “don’t feel like border patrolling. Soon you will scare that feeling right out of your system.
Let me know if you have any questions or need clarification.