Sorting of Incoming Ideas: Insights from the French Fry Machine Metaphor

French Fries with salt

We have been discussing the origin of ideas, thoughts, and information that come into our minds. I have met many who struggle with understanding why it is vital to become skilled at pre-sorting, or discerning the substance and origin of these ideas before processing them.  The following metaphor has helped many to understand the concept […]

Overriding Fear in Marriage Repair

woman who looks like she's going crazy with negative thoughts!

The struggle with intrusive thoughts can be a significant roadblock in the intricate world of relationships. Many of us, grounded in faith, understand these uninvited, often negative thoughts as attacks from Satan, meant to distort our perception and disrupt our decision-making process. These spiritual attacks can push us to dwell on worst-case scenarios and overlook […]

Using “The Pattern for Growth” to Fine-tune the Agile Checklist for Becoming Better Husbands

upward growth chart

How can we apply organizational principles and the wisdom of living prophets to become better spouses?  This article explores this concept, blending the principles from Atul Gawande’s “The Checklist Manifesto,” Agile project management methodology, and the “Pattern for Growth” as provided by our faith in an effort to become better Presiding Husbands. **Simplicity in Complexity** Navigating the […]

8 Steps to Mastering the Art of Presiding in Marriage

husband, wife and family

Once, I thought that marriage was about dividing responsibilities and tasks, but I realized that approach was leading to a cohabitation-style marriage. We lived together, but we weren’t harmoniously linked as a couple.  Through studying hundreds of couples and prayerfully considering the prophets’ teachings, I have discovered a more harmonious approach to marriage. The following […]

Torment

Man with hand on woman's shoulder as she struggles with something like betrayal trauma

As we strive to strengthen ourselves and our marriages, it is important to remember that Satan is always watching and waiting for an opportunity to strike. In 1 Peter 5:8, it says, “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” We must […]

Working on Emotional Intimacy – Discussing the Past

Husband and Wife together

Emotional Intimacy is one of the hardest phases of the entire process of rebuilding and repairing your marriage. You will need to be able to skillfully keep the Spirit present during conversations, and skillfully retreat and regroup if things start to fall apart.

A Presiding Tool: Initiating Verbal Intimacy

man and woman talking, verbal intimacy

Some elements of relationship improvement and healing seem very difficult, but are actually very simple. Working on the first level of the 5 Intimacies, Verbal Intimacy, is a must. Try this some time… Approach your wife on just about any subject and ask, “What is your opinion on….?” Easy, right? The actually act of starting […]

The 4 Square Listening Tool

The 4 Square Listening Tool

How to use it and why it works *You can also watch Maurice explain this topic in a video training HERE. Many of us find ourselves in conversations where we start to feel “flooded”. This term is used to describe a complex psycho-biochemical experience where our ability to listen with an open mind is decreased […]

Don’t Bicker, Counsel

Don’t Bicker, Counsel

“You bring that up every time we talk about this. That’s stupid and we are not writing that down, I told you that already!” – A man who isn’t creating safety for his wife. My wife and I decided we wanted to sit down and write down our reason why we were moving forward with […]

Sex as a Reward?

woman upset with man

A common question asked of me in my work with women who have experienced betrayal trauma or sexual trauma is something like, “What role is sexuality supposed to play in a healthy relationship?”