
What does it mean to live a value-based lifestyle?
How does that impact a person in their ability to function and become the person they want to be?
How does it compare to living a shame-based lifestyle and having a shame-based recovery?
Perhaps these are some questions you have considered in your quest for self-mastery. I know these are questions I’ve considered on my self-mastery journey in becoming a better husband, father, friend, and son of God.
“It’s not an addiction problem, it’s an honesty issue.” What does that mean?
Let’s take a moment and consider the alternative of shame-based recovery.
One of the best places to start is to recognize that shame can only get a person so far.
Sure, a few days. A week. Maybe a few months? At what price?

Eventually you’ll give in to the same pattern of satanic lies often in the form of your own voice because the lies are more believable that way.
Knowing that “you’ll never get over this so there’s really no point in trying.”
Knowing that “you’ll always be this way.”
Believing that “no one else in this world has a carnal nature the same way you do.”
Continuing to believe that “no one could ever love you if they really knew the true you.”
All of these thoughts are lies Satan uses to draw you away from living a value-based life.
Why? Because living a value-based life is the antidote to shame.
Values confirm that as a child of God you have an innate worth and a divine potential that no amount of external forces can change.
Values are the reflection of the true desires that overcome carnal nature.
They draw you towards becoming the person you want to be in the exact moment you live in. They determine your priorities and provide the measurement you’ll use to decide if your life is turning out the way you envisioned.
How can you measure whether or not you are living true to your values?
For me, it’s the simple recognition that I’m facing opposition.
I recognize the continuous pattern that Satan wants me off my game. He doesn’t want me to be an honest and good father, husband, student, and future therapist. He doesn’t want me to believe that people can genuinely love the honest me.
Yet, I’ve discovered his badgering is almost pathetic as I continue to recognize I am worth loving and I know others will love me in all that I have to offer.
I recognize I am worthy of my values and worthy of a life that makes me happy.
I encourage you to discover the values that will motivate you toward an honest and worthwhile life. Find those things that will motivate you toward a life and an ability to truly thrive.
Continue to be ambitious, channel your passions, and find ways to offset the adversary as he seeks to drag you down.
One day Satan will be bound…why not make it today?
Written by Brandon Nite, MSW graduate, Northwest Nazarene University. You can reach Brandon at bnitetherapy@gmail.com.